Similarity
by LifeLivedVicariously
Summary: In the end, we are all soldiers. Goodness is simply a definition defined by the victor. RaphaelAsmodeus AU and a possible rating change later. My summary sucks so read the story instead.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note:

Hi! I am LifeLivedVicariously and this is my first fanfic so constuctive criticism is greatly appreciated. (Please don't be too cruel okay?) Well, obviously I don't own the Bible (since then there'd be slashfics in it if I had my way). This is slash which means "male on male" so if you don't like, don't read. Later chapters might get a bit AU (if I actually write them) so...Enjoy!

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"Is this the best you can do little angel?" Chains clanked and scratched against one another in a futile attempt to break. Scornful purple eyes glared yet a smile was plastered on the owner's handsome face. That smile was more violent than amiable. The pale skin of the creature's visage was distorted with madness, only highlighting the amethyst slits on the sides of his face. They were the markings all demons had, regardless of which order they were from. "Satisfied with yourself? Going to throw a party and hang my corpse as the prize?" Short black hair spiked rebelliously from the demon's head. They flowed together to form one body of black that defied gravity. Traces of purple highlighting also shimmered in the light. "I'm sure you and Michael will have a wonderful time parading me throughout Heaven." His long limbs were awkwardly tied behind him and jerked oddly in a vain attempt to be free. "God sure will be pleased won't he Raphael." 

"Have you anything intelligent to say demon?" The angel patiently waited for the demon to stop ranting. His long blonde hair was drawn into a loose ponytail at the back of his neck and draped lazily over his shoulders. A cross with an arrow tip on each end centered itself on his forehead. His cream skin was tanned from the sun. Presently his blue eyes were more closed than normal. He was tired. Chasing, trapping, and binding a demon would be enough to drain any angel; even a seraph wouldn't be in that great of a shape afterwards. Now add in a desert and you have what Raphael was doing, well, did.

"Why, my talking is too 'brainless' for you angel?" Raphael shrugged. He did not want this assignment in the first place but since Michael and Gabriel were higher in the "nonexistent" divine hierarchy, he was given it with refusal not an option. Trying to complain about a mission was senseless because then you were frowned upon as a winy little spoiled brat and that was not the reputation this seraph wanted. Sarah was the only person he felt somewhat sympathetic towards in this whole mess. Imagine having seven of your husbands killed continuously after each wedding. At least Tobias was a kind human. This whole incident is going to have repercussions in all three worlds, he thought and groaned inwardly. Being diplomatic was not going to be fun.

"Hey, Raph. Why so glum? Did you just realize you're an idiotic git who has no right keeping me from Sarah?" Why wouldn't he stay quiet? Angels know when to not speak. Surely, demons were taught something like that in Hell too, Raph thought.

"In case you haven't realized, Sarah was the one who summoned me to hunt you Asmodeus."

Silence seemed to cling like palpability and lasted for what felt like years. No movement, no noise, no insults. Asmodeus really was awed. His eyes slightly widened from shock. Raphael preyed that this would shut him up.

"Liar." Asmodeus, if possible, seemed to triple in rage. He didn't even have his friendly façade anymore. He was simply furious. His intense lavender eyes began to glow menacingly and he was no longer smiling. Blackness started to swirl dangerously at the edges of his chains as he sat up, emanating with rage. He was using magic to corrode the metal.

"Stop. You know I won't let you rust them away." Raphael said non-chalantly as he stood up and burned off the shadow with white light that radiated from his hands.

Asmodeus glowered and looked at the floor. It wasn't really a floor. It was just a massive accumulation of dust, he noted, made of gold sand like shards of the sun. This filth was arrange haphazardly on the land and therefore formed this portion of Earth. Analyzing was something Asmodeus did when he felt a surge of any emotion because it quickly and effortlessly removed any feeling he had or could've had.

Something brighter than the sun loomed into his vision. They were slivers of daylight so pure that all it laid upon looked dirty in the process. It was Raphael's hair. When did he move, Asmodeus asked himself. Is he gazing at me? Wait, for a second, he actually seemed concerned. Raphael knelt down, razing a small ball of dust that made him seem all the more heavenly. He looked Asmodeus square in the eye.

He's kneeling on this disgusting ground just so he could observe me, the demon thought. Observe? Doubt crawled into his mind but then he pushed it away. Yes. Because I'm nothing but a specimen, he recalled, I'm just an inanimate object. Then he felt that familiar burn on his chest again. This was why he hated all of these emotions. This was why loneliness was the one thing he cherished and despised. Of course, came the defeatist acceptance of Asmodeus. Loneliness meant isolation and isolation meant no one to interact with. Loneliness would've kept me from finding Sarah and believing that I had found someone to care about because I love loneliness, he told himself.

But then again, pointed out by the cunning part of his character he survived on, loneliness was also the reason I had searched for her as well. "Heh." Then bubbles of insane laughter started to pop from his mouth. Oh well, I'm just a stupid hypocrite aren't I? I'm only a puppet. He laughed even louder as he tried desperately to drown out his own, useless revelation. He felt tears well behind his eyes but they smoldered away before they could drip out. Is that what I was to Sarah too?

"Why are you sad?"

Asmodeus continued staring at the ground as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. "Demons cannot feel pain, correct?" asked Raphael. The seraph was genuinely interested but pity laced his voice and the demon caught the emotion's scent. Anyway, it's not as if he gave the angel a damn. Raph continued speaking regardless. "At least, that's what they say in Heaven."

Silence.

"Are you not pitiless like all the others?"

No response.

"Is it pain you feel or are you just moody? Are you sad or is this fake so I would release you out of sympathy?"

No response.

"I'll take that it's the later then."

No response.

Raphael sighed. Just when I thought that maybe he'd talk with me about something worthwhile. He ran his hands through his blonde hair. Even a snide remark like that couldn't get him to do anything. How pointless of me to try and comfort him. Soundlessly the angel rose and brushed off his white robes. He walked to the entrance of the cave and looked across the golden desert. Michael still wasn't here yet. Well, at least it was quiet.

A couple of hours later the demon reverted to his old self. "Going to let me rot in this crevice of your stupid God's creation?" Yes, Asmodeus was back to his usual obnoxiousness, and at full throttle too.

Perhaps his temporary lack of rudeness was something I imagined Raphael thought, sighing again for the umpteenth time and running his fingers through his golden hair again. The angel was sitting rather lazily in a chair he had materialized from the cave's wall and was counting how many stalactites were hanging from the ceiling with his eyes. This is more mind numbing than endless combat drilling with Michael, the most prudent (and egotistical) soldier in all of Heaven (and Earth too even though we're not suppose to interact with humans) Raph said to himself. He sighed another time. Why did I take this mission again?

Asmodeus, unlike Raphael, was grinning happily. Oh, how he loved digging into people's skin and leaving maggots of frustration there. And to make it sweeter, it was an angel's perfect little "infinite patience" skin. Any previous depressing sentiments were locked in the dark recesses of the demon's mind so he wouldn't feel them until later. After all, he didn't need them ruining his fun. Pain could wait for the privacy of his own room when he returned to Hell.

"Hey angel, I said are you going to let me rot in this crevice of your stupid God's creation."

Raphael turned around with an expressionless face from his current activity of counting. There was no way he was going to give a demon the satisfaction of seeing him vexed. So, he calmed his features even more before he started the arduous and possibly impossible task set before him: conversing with Asmodeus. There's no better time than now, he thought to himself bitterly.

"Regrettably no, although leaving you here yourself seems like a far better alternative, I alas, have no authority to do so. I am waiting, instead, for Michael who will take you into Heaven's prisons. My mission was only to apprehend and keep watch over you until he arrives." But killing you might not be so bad sneaked into Raph's (now slightly annoyed) mind. I wonder how much trouble I would get in if I actually did that? Then he smiled to himself and chuckled softly. No, I don't really like to hurt anything, but I won't tell him that. Suddenly he remembered how he foolishly failed at fighting for the Divine Legions. Lending a hand and healing your opponent's wounds was apparently not the thing to do on the battlefield. Spending "precious" sparring time to categorize herbs and their functions on different types of injuries was also not a thing a "real" soldier was meant to do. But then again, he thought, that is what made me realize that I was destined to be a healer.

"Have you gone mad angel because you're laughing for no reason." Raphael was snapped unhappily from his reverie.

"Well, I didn't say you were behaving bizarrely when you started to cackle out of the blue and then became somber Asmodeus. Besides, I was reliving some of my cheerful memories."

"Hey, I was having a life-changing revelation then." He growled out.

"And what did you conclude from you "life-changing revelation"?"

The demon was mute. That my life is nothing for I'm lower than even the most deprived of beings because I'm just a fucking object. No one cares about me and I was tricked by the only person I had ever conceivably "loved". That I'm just a puppet that Sarah had the strings of.

"Nothing worth noting."

"What a waste of time then." The angel said, resting his head on the arm of the stone chair while his long hair that wasn't confined by his ponytail spread languidly about him. He slowly closed his eyes but said clearly and truthfully. "But I think that you are lying." And with that, he fell asleep.

"Well, perhaps I was."

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	2. Chapter 2

Hello! I'm back. Well, since somebody told me that I should write my thoughts in italics (cough Tsume7 cough) I did. You know the disclaimer (me not owning the Bible, this being slash, etc.). By the way, this might not get fluffy for awhile so I apologize. Asmo and Raph (those are my little nicknames for them -) need to build up on their relationship more so the whole point of this chapter is for Asmo to understand Raph. More coming soon so keep reading and reviewing! After all, I won't write more unless you review!

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Who does this angel think he is?_ Asmodeus watched the sleeping form of Raphael. _He'd so damn peeving and I bet he knows this just as well._ His amethyst gaze scanned around the dull cave. The seraph was much more devious than one would perceive. The floors had no giant stones, only small hills of sand that the demon couldn't transmute into anything. His chains were tight and made of pure silver but strangely enough, not uncomfortable. Although there were stalactites adorning the ceiling, the little angel had smothered them with his light so it would burn the demon to try and reach it with magic. Even the chair Raphael rested on glowed to weaken him. Asmo was really annoyed now. _Damn this angel and his actually competent planning_.

_What's wrong with him?_ It had been sometime now and Asmodeus was beginning to get bored. He poked his spirit at the sleeping Raphael_. Why does his aura feel so off?_ Soundlessly the demon crept up to Raph and began prodding his mind. First, there was darkness but then images floated in and out languidly. _Stupid angel actually left his defenses wide open._ He grinned evilly. _This'll be fun._

THIS IS A MEMORY! (NOTE: THE USE OF ITALICS IS WEIRD SO TOO BAD IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT)

_Michael was scolding him _(at which Asmodeus sniggered because that was just too funny_). Apparently, Raph was a horrible swordsman. _

"_You know you'll never win if you have no motivation Raphael."_

_The longhaired angel muttered under his breath as he brushed dirt from his pants. "Whoever said I wanted to do this in the first place?" Then he retrieved his sword from the floor again. "I don't plan on being a soldier anyway Michael."_

"_Regardless of what you plan on being, you must learn to fence. It is obligatory of all angels." Raph glared at him. "Yes, even Seraphim Raphael, so I suggest you get over it. Anyway," Michael took ready position, "angels who cannot fight are useless, especially to God"_

Then, as quickly as it came, the memory ebbed away. Another one came and took its place.

_Uriel was sitting on the borderline of Hell and Heaven polishing her sword. Her raven hair drifted slightly in and out of her green eyes. Raph slowly walked thoughtlessly into the clearing. He didn't seem to be paying attention._

"_How are you Raphael?" said Uriel._

"_Oh!" Raph looked startled. "I'm fine. And you?"_

"_I'm wonderful myself." She glanced upwards from her weapon. "Is something the matter Raph?" she asked in a concerned tone._

"_No…it's nothing." _

_The dark angel smiled calmly. "I doubt it's nothing if you came all the way here."_

_The blond fidgeted nervously. He stared at the ground pathetically. "I really am a horrible soldier aren't I?"_

_Light laughter resonated in the air. "Why would you think an absurd thing like that?" Uriel put away her sword and faced him. "You're not at all as awful as you think you are. Why, I've seen you practice with more accuracy than Michael several times."_

"_But…Michael always makes me feel so worthless. Why am I of such high ranking Uriel?" He cried despairingly. " I'm a terrible fighter, I'm not aggressive, and I'm not anything it takes to be a seraph." Raph looked away at the sky. "I'm haven't value. If God were to replace me, I doubt that even half of Heaven would notice."_

A heavy ache fell upon Asmodeus' heart. How sad. Even he felt pity for the boy. _In Hell, no one ever went out and said one was useless if one couldn't fight. Samael always looked for other ways a person could help if he or she wasn't a warrior by nature. Nobody was ever told they were worthless. _The demon gazed empathetically at the angel. _I always thought Heaven was paradise. Heaven was the unattainable dreamland, wasn't it? _

A soft white light shown in the distance. Small children ran in and out. It was a new memory.

_Kids were laughing with Raph as he taught them the uses of certain herbs for medicine. _

"_Look Mawster Raphie! I faowned this flowa!" said the youngest child. She was barely three. The "flowa" was white with tints of gold. It looked like an inverted sun._

"_Why, it's very lovely Murielle." The angel was in his human form so his wings were gone. Still, the same sadness that was present with Uriel lingered in his voice. The other children had gone to fetch some wild grasses in the prairie leaving him with Little Murielle. Raphael sat down upon the ground and sighed. The small girl began to play with his hair. _

"_Mawster Raphie, how come you sownd so sad?"_

_Raph put on his best fake smile and cocked his head slightly to the side. "Why do you say that?"_

_The little girl gave him her best angry glare. "'Cawse you keep sighing. You need ta hide yur emotens beta than tha'." _

_He sighed again. "I guess I do." Raphael looked at the blue sky. White clouds moved leisurely by. The trees rustled in the gentle breeze. He closed his eyes and laid down._

"_Have you ever felt so insignificant that you question your existence Murielle?" asked Raph as his long hair blew with the wind._

"_Ya. But Mama an' Papa always make me feel beta."_

_The angel chuckled. "Yes, but I haven't parents." He opened his yellow eyes and they turned painfully melancholy. _

"_Oh." A great gust of air blew through the grass. The flower Murielle clutched was carried away by the wind. _

A new memory arose. And you know Asmodeus; well of course, he had to pry it open.

_"Why isn't he breathing Uriel?" A younger version of Raph sat in a battlefield scattered with corpses spanning to the horizon and beyond. A mortal was sprawled on the blood stained dirt with an excruciating expression. His eyes were hollow, as if a spear had impaled them both. There were many wounds on his body, so many that he resembled a rotten potato. Dried blood crusted around him in a pool of red. He smelled sweet but with the metallic tang of iron and the bitter poison of death. His legs were dismembered from his torso, lying idly from him. His face was no longer familiar with the face of a man for it was brown with decay and dark with mud. A cold smog seemed to ooze from him._

"_Do you really want to know Raph?" asked Uriel carefully. A questioning glance came from her worried expression. _

"_Yes. Of course I want to know Uriel!" Raph was outraged. "Who would kill someone in this grotesque of a method? They would have to be a monster!"_

_Uriel hesitated and sheathed her sword. She closed her eyes and turned away. "If I tell you this Raphael, every self-concept you've had about yourself will be crushed." The dark hair angel turned around and let her green eyes bore into him harshly. "Do you still want to know?"_

_Raph was taken back. He diverted his gaze to the dead man again and felt rage and pity in his heart. Then he turned and met Uriel's unrelenting gaze. "Yes."_

_Uriel sighed and was silent. Years seemed to pass in between._

_Silently, she said, "It's because you killed him." _

_Raph was shocked. His bright yellow eyes widened and he looked at the corpse, so defiled with sin. "What? I-I didn't. I couldn't!" The frightened little seraph tried to recollect every action he had ever done since his creation, every memory he could recall. He had never committed such a crime. He knelt upon the bloody ground holding his head. "No, I didn't! I-I don't remember!"_

_"Raph…As angels, it is our duty to kill, regardless with what our hearts may _

_dictate." Uriel turned away to look at the setting sun. "God, he-" The dark angel stopped. "Well, he isn't the best kind of father." The sky was beginning to run red. The darkness of night seeped through the cracks of day and infected it with black. Orange laced the golden orb of light. Sunset had just begun._

_"Raph, God activated the berserker curse for you." The young seraph looked confused. Uriel stared at the ground. "It's a way to make an angel have their first taste of blood and the curse insures that we all fight."_

_"What?" The blonde angel was horrified. "God actually cursed us?"_

_The dimming sun hid Uriel's face. "I'm so sorry Raph." White tears glimmered as they slid from her leaf-green eyes and fell to the earth. Grass sprouted eagerly from the gruesome ground and twined themselves around the numb dead._

_Meanwhile, night had finally come._

Raphael (quite unknowingly of all inside his head) slept in a panicked state, locked inside that memory. Outward he looked calm but then again, he was an angel and they just don't fret. Inside, a flood of guilt and self-loathing overwhelmed him. It was as if they had covered his mouth, nose, ears and had proceeded to smother him in sadness. He was drowning in grief and like drowning, it clogged every pore of his body, only to leave him as a bloated sponge of sorrow. Anguish filled him again and gagged his spirit. _Why did I have to sin?_ Images of that dead man bombarded his mind. _Why did I have to kill him?_

Asmodeus dragged himself away from the memory. It still burned in his mind. _A berserker curse on angels? Even we don't have that!_ He fumed angrily. I_ never knew that God was such a bastard to his own men. How unfairly he treats them! It's worse than Hell!_ Fury built and his magic started to flare. The cuffs around his wrists suddenly sent a jolt of pain through him. Luckily, it was only a warning shot. Irked, the demon forced a sense of tranquility into his seething self. _Stupid, proficient angel._ Slowly, the rage in him disappeared and he cooled off.

Asmodeus watched Raphael again. His hair had surrounded him in a web of gold. The demon gave a small smirk. _So, God really is a little prick after all. And to think he said my master was bad._ He continued to stare at Raph. Honestly, he really felt bad for the seraph. Demons were given more freedom than him. For an angel to be imprisoned in his own "utopia" was heartbreaking. _At least I like my leader, _Asmodeus thought as he sighed._ Now I'm picking up Raphael's sighing. Great._ He looked back at the angel but he still felt pity. In truth, the people in Hell were fairly decent. No one complained much. Samael was pretty wise in putting people to work. Everyone got to do what they liked. Nothing was mandatory. Then Asmodeus realized what he was doing._ Shit. I can't believe I'm empathizing with a frickin angel. _A bit of shame filled his heart when he remembered inconveniencing Raphael just to tick him off. A saddening smile graced his lips.

"Well, how was I to know real angels existed?"

Fatigue had wrapped its tendrils lovingly around Asmodeus. _Damn it. I'm getting tired and just after this!_ The whole "running around Media and sneaking into someone's mind furtively" had drained him. Not to mention that staying awake the entire time that Raphael had him in custody made him tired too. But then, maybe it was the emotional thing that had exhausted him the most._ Perhaps I should take a leaf out of Raphael's book and get some sleep._ Asmodeus yawned genuinely. Now half conscious, the demon started to lull into sleep. Still, guilt and a bit of protectiveness pricked him. Thus, he did the one thing he'd never imagined doing.

"Well… goodnight Raph."

Asmo stretched flexiblely and curled himself like a cat. Gradually, his amethyst eyes closed and he was taken by slumber.

Raphael woke up to the sun setting at the mouth of the cave._ I haven't dreamt that one for a while._ Suddenly, he noticed something wet on his hand. A single diamond-like tear sparkled, contrasting with the dull paleness of his skin. He couldn't believe he had wept.

In the corner of his eye, he could see Asmodeus sleeping serenely with his head lopped on a random chunk of rock. _At least he hadn't seen me cry,_ he thought thankfully. _No doubt, he would have teased me persistently for the rest of eternity. _A chuckle came to his throat. _What would have he thought if he had seen my dream? _Then he timidly glanced at Asmodeus who was sleeping so peacefully. At that moment, the demon looked so helpless and sweet. A smile spread infectiously on Raph's face. He giggled softly. "How angelic."

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